I'm an old fart and male which, among other things, means I hate shopping.

The internet has been great for me, allowing me to investigate purchases on line and then just wander in to a place I know what I want is on sale and buy it.

I always pay cash so am usually in and out quickly.

Unfortunately recently the internet has let me down.

I want to buy a PC notebook.

All I want it for is to run a word processor and spreadsheet program, work some of my business records, send the odd email and maybe play on the internet.

For anything more I have my desk-top PC.

I searched the internet and decided that the ASUS Eee PC 701 (4 Gig solid state HD and 512meg RAM) netbook running on linux was probably going to be good enough for my wants, put a few hundred in my pocket and wandered out to buy one.

I parked at a shopping centre where Harvey Norman, Noel Leeming, Dick Smith, Warehouse Stationary and Smiths City had set up shop

Whoops!

The only ASUS 701 I could find was running Windows XP, reducing memory dramatically and was pink.

I returned home and re-researched notebooks, recorded a couple that appeared to be suitable, particularly the ASUS 901 and ventured forth once again with high hopes.

A couple of hours later I returned home deflated once again.

I have discovered that computer shops either contain salesmen who are way over the top, hard sell types not immune to lying through their teeth for a sale and who would rather push a rental/hp type sale than simply take the cash or disinterested scrofulous youths with no sale skills, no people skills and no interest in creating an atmosphere that will encourage sales, instead preferring to display their hearing disabilities to the world.

Two weeks after starting my quest I remain notebookless.

But richer.